Painfull

False words are like locusts in wheat crops, belief is something that is earned from the beginning is lost in time, words that die and become memories that are false hypothesis, is seeking new ones, but they are only assumptions are based on experience and instinct that lead us to say or believe things which we try to show by some method. Apologies that are fallacies, "sorry" that are nothing more than empty words, phrases no longer make sense to me, I embrace my loneliness looking not to have more bad decision, trying not to make more mistakes, I seek stable points in my life, I try to find us no reason to be so, but none is convincing enough to change. The blood of my body is so slow that the other does not make sense, adrenaline are low that I can not even get angry, I can not really be upset even if want it. Cursed words that come out of my mouth, I can not invoke curses, pain is simple and is only pain in my side.

Gods that mock the men and make them their puppets in a theater called Earth, with its irony and its efforts actions to be more useless in their hearts there is greed and pride, but also inserted in them something called love a feeling you can do value life more than anything or despise the very same, creating wars, poems and monuments in his name, leading men to suicide by the lack of it, or contempt of the beloved. A feeling that kills slowly and makes life more pleasant. But today I curse as well as the gods who created it, my mind has collapsed and faith that one day I had disappeared, time to heal my wounds, time to not believe in lies, not to destroy time, time to find a new way to take me to a place to call home, I just want time to make it not hurt so much.

Time has a way of taking time
Loneliness is not only felt by fools
Alone I call to ease the pain
Yearning to be held by you, alone, so alone, I'm lost
Consumed by the pain
The pain, the pain, the pain

"In My Darkest Hour" - Megadeth