Princess

When I started this blog I started with a video and a person that I still have in my mind and my soul today I dreamed with her, with her smile and her face, everything I remember about her, I am like a ghost hating to be a painful dream, like an asshole, I have hurt many people, many people who have been important to me, one was her, now walking alone in the shadows because is the place I belong, the songs start to pentrate my mind, destroying my defenses,  now the days in the past are like a vison that hurt my pierced soul, That pain that hold me up in the morning, that make me wish the death, but my sins do not let me die, One cup of coffee in the damn morning, I hate to dream because every dream I have is nightmare now and was a dream in the past, the reality absob my body in the shower, the hot water hurts my skin and remind me I am not sleep, one beer and  another cup is my breakfast, I remember of the ocean sound, the street full of presons that have their own problems, The music start with a forgonten song Echos of the luna cult, All I think is about her, about the bad dream I am now for her or is what I wish or What I want to be for her.

She is still a princess in a world far away, in a place where there is still hope, I want her happiness, even in my dreams I walk among the living ones I disappea frome their lives like a shadow, without warning, is my way of being, like a bastard, I do not deny I hurt me and the people around me, But is the only form I can control myself.

She wasn't the first one how I left, stop searching, talking, I disappear like a ghost like a bad dream, this is my way,  knowing I would pay for my sins.

I am the architect of my own destiny, my past is my bridge and future is uncertain. But I would never forget what I have done to you little princess. I do not deserve forgiveness and I am not seeking redemption. I am who I am, nothing more nothing else, I have fogote how to smile, but that was the price.